Do you feel like you have a calling in life?
I think I figured it out back when I was in eighth grade and I took home economics. I made my first tomato omelette and I thought it was the best damn thing ever. Then I convinced my parents to by the products so that I could recreate it for them at home. Shit, I remember my mom sat down all nervous and shit with her fork about to take a bite of her 12 year olds first cooked meal ever...
From there, I knew I had good taste in food, My taste buds just knew authentic and I began to wonder what it was like in kitchen, It took me forever to actually learn how to cook. I started by having people show me what they put in things then I got more advanced and just did the plain old trial and error.
Dayum, I even remember cooking for 20 of my co-workers one time....
I just couldn't imagine myself pushing the papers anymore at Bank of America. I utilized the tuition reimbursement program, used my generous stock options and did extensive research and I enrolled in an evening culinary program at The Art Institute of Seattle.
This is how serious I was about being a chef....
I think for the whole year of 2002 and 2003 I didn't think I'd have any kids only because I knew if I wanted to be on top, I'd have to work 50-60 hour weeks, most likely evenings.
One of my good culinary friends from L.A tried to convince me to move there after I graduated because "they got all the hot spots" and that has always been in the back of my mind.
I was considering not getting married because I really wanted to go to France that year to cook at the Cannes Film Festival.
I took a $5 pay cut and lost 4 weeks of vacation, benefits, and 6hours of internet surfing/2hours of actual pushing of papers to go work my ass off on a hot ass line with a Chef that had really nice arms and ass- but he could cook!
So what happened?????? Life happened. Gabby happened. But it's ok.
I remember my boyfriend in high school said "why can't you cook like my ex..." HA..if only that asshole could taste my shit now......
What compliment are you most often given?
It's been while since I've received a compliment.
So lemme compliment myself: girl, you got a nice booty...Imma hit dat.
Ah, thank you self.....
Tonight is the last night in my place.
I envision myself drinking coffee about 10pm to stay awake and pack. Trying to keep Gabby entertained while packing is challenging.
This is a big deal for me. I asked myself the question do I really need to move back with my parents a thousand times. I know that I don't have to, I know that I've successfully lived on my own. But with my asshole landlord doing such a good job of being an ass fuck, I decided I'd rather not give him anymore of my hard earned money. I deserve better.
Some things I'm doing differently...
I hired a moving company to help me. I'm packing everything on my own. I didn't ask anyone for help. Call it my stubborn-ness but if I can get through this, dammit... then I'm stronger than I think. Unless you've been in my situation in life example...living with your ex for 8 years, depending on someone for your every move, having a child, trying to build your career back, trying to find yourself, being single, trying to find out if you truly have a calling in life, then you know the shit aint easy.
Nothing is ever easy.
I remember my first night here. The sounds of the traffic going by, the street lights shining though my room, no furniture, unfamiliar faces. It was overwhelming. I've spent many nights here crying. Many nights laughing. Hell- many nights on the fucking internet or stumbling in drunk.
Then I knew what I had to do.
I knew I had to make it feel like a home. Make it my place. I got furniture, came familiar with my fucking nosey neighbors, found late night spots, a Thai restaurant, a bar, a nail shop.and soon before I knew it- I became a West Seattle-lite.
And dammit, I've enjoyed it.
So tonight I will spend my last night not saying goodbye, but see you later hood...Better things await me. I know my independence isn't stripped from me. I know that I can take out my own garbage, pay my bills, hang my own pictures, and am able to create a home.
Though I feel like I'm taking a step back I know that I've came a long way.
What's your favorite type of Girl Scout cookie?
Samoa's fo sho....
Then Thin Mint's....
Currently I have the new lemon flavor at my desk. Only because if I have the ones I really love, I will eat the whole box by myself.
What aspect of your personality could use a little work?
I think I'm shy.
Sometimes I think I need to have a little bit more confidence in myself and realize that it's ok to talk a bit more.
Tonight I decided to throw Gabby in her Dora underwear and see what happens.
I told her:
Gabby, I'm taking off your diapers...I'm putting your underwear on. When you have to go pee, tell Mommy and I will take you to go potty. Don't pee in your underwear."
Gabby: Yes Mama.
So as I'm packing, I'm glancing over at her just to see how's she adjusting. Well, I caught her picking her underwear out her ass. She must have learned that from me....
She's getting it down.
Then I notice she's been gone a few minutes. I walk in the bedroom and what do I see? Gabby standing in a puddle of her piss..Oh great. I remind myself not to get angry. I clean her up put her on the toilet and explain again...when you're wearing underwear, you tell Mama and we'll go to the potty.
Gabby: Yes Mama.
We're now in the kitchen. She's helping me by holding the bag open for me while I organize my spices. Then I look down. I see yet another puddle. I'm thinking, holy shit, I thought we were packing dry baking goods right now....Don't tell me....
She pissed again.
We'll try this again tomorrow night..............
It could have been worse, right? She could have shitted everywhere....But wait she didn't touch her dinner....
The challenges of being a parent.
What's your favorite meal to make for dinner when you're trying to be frugal?
Scramble eggs with tuna, garlic and ketchup either served with corn tortillas or rice.
Yea, when is the bitch planning on replacing my 10.00 cheese?
That's what I just asked my boss when we were having a meeting. She told me that brie thief feels that people treat her differently now after she stole my brie.
Um.........YOU THINK??????
Here we go...
Love:
The fact my daughter is using her strawberry rain boots as a bucket, putting her puzzle pieces in there and gave it to me tonight as a birthday gift.
My daughter ate all of her mac and cheese.
The weather was great.
I got a lot of work done today.
No one stole my brie.
I did a ton of squats in my evening class and in my class at work and I only wanted to cry for my mommy once.
He left his shirt here and it still smells like him...
My pillow still smelled like him too.
My new cute little iPod blocks out the sound of my drunk co-workers.
Loathe:
My daughter has picked up on back-talking me
I have real bad anxiety right now and it was affecting my breathing during my classes..
I didn't take lunch until 3:45pm.
I had a bad hair day.
What's the meanest thing you've ever said to someone?
The other day I told my pregnant friend she could, "Look at the bright side and consider her pregnancy a free 9 month 12-step program to her drinking".
