Show us something that represents how the month of March went for you.
I didn't know what to name this blog...
I wasn't the only one who shaved my cooch this morning OR...
Ain't no shame in your pubic game.
So...I told you about the broad who blow dries her pubes at the gym...if I haven't well this older lady at the gym and she uses the hand dryers and aims the shit on her pubes. I told T that I'd be right back cuz I had to piss. As I walk outta the stall and turn to wash my hands, there she was butt naked hand dryer in full force and looking at me...LMAO. I was laughing so hard I couldn't contribute to a cleaner health society and wash my hands, T 's looking at me like, What 's so funny??I just point to my vagina and start rollin. I told her to go look.
OMG...she ain't got no shame, huh?
I'm like, Hey did you notice she took that extra five minutes this morning to groom her shit...
Hopefully no one will blogging about me tonight and my uncontrollable Chia pet cuz I aint got no shame in my coochie shaving game. I took 7 minutes and shaved properly so that when I put on my 10.00 Victoria Secret panties, I feel HOT...rrriigghhttt.....................
I miss him. No other way to say it.
*now
go to sleep, shave your coochie in the morning,eat some protein and go
to the gym tomorrow night where I’m sure some lucky Seattle guy who is
still straight would love to try your pie and rub on your Kristina
Kardashian ass.
Before I walked out the door the other night, my friend asked me when will I tell her about what happened. My makeup was fresh and my hair was thrown in a Coach hat because nature's calling on Friday brought snow and freezing rain to Seattle.
I practiced saying it.
*eyes whelling up.."We're cool, we're friends."
Friends? Are you gonna see him?
No.
Friends? You still fucking him?
No.
Friends?? You love him...that must be hard.....
Yea.............................................You know my eyeliner looks real good right now and I think we should talk about something else.
I didn't need to get numbers that night. What I needed was to bob my head with some music and sip on 3 Rum with Diet's. And that's what I did.....
Tonight my friend asked me if I need to be in relationship to be happy....
No.
But next time I fly if ever again to see someone to date them or choose to bang the shit outta em on the regular, a little appreciation and affection would be nice. That would make me fucking happy.
I don't need to know what you were doing at 6:57pm on March 13th but I'd like to be secure that you're not sticking it to 5 other girls and jepordizing my vagina and my mouth for that matter.
Is that a relationship?
I don't know. I can't tell you about relationships because I was never in one.
*Welcome back bitter blogging, we missed you, you like fell in love and stuff and started being all happy, well grab a drink and let's catch up...........
What do you bring most to a friendship?
I usually bring a great entree with a side of humor.
Why do you think it is some people don't get along with you?
I think because I like things that are considered different and I don't like to be "comfortable" and some people get scared off by that. And..I'm actually shy and kind of quiet and maybe they take that as being stuck up.
If this ends up on the back of a Starbuck's cup then that's just scary.........
" A good friend will always be there for you in time of need. An even better friend will invite you to Vegas for a bachelor party, get you lap dances, a buffet, and offer to sleep with you or hook you up with one of his horny friends."
What talent do you have that you wish more people would recognize?
This Mami can cook mofo.....shiyet...................*pshhhh and do dishes at the same time...
That I have a shit streak on my new Victoria Secret panties....
UGH.................................................
