I was informed that one of my co-workers in their spare time dresses up as an anime character and takes pictures of themselves. Right now I'm enjoying my morning coffee and peepin Adult Swim and I just had a mental picture of home dude wearing either the karate looking outfit or the pleated skirt with a cape......
Yikes......
The sooner I go to sleep...the sooner I'm one day closer to the month of May.....
Let's start with Loathe...
Loathe:
The fact that I've typed about 20 emails to him but have sent 0.
My hair lately.
My depression is catching up with me.
The kick boxing class tonight. the system was broken...the teacher was stressin, well she still taught a good class!
I've cried so much over the past few days my eyelids look permanently damaged.
Love:
The DKNY jacket I bought at a thrift store for 9.99.
The H&M jacket that I got last week (at a thrift store for 19.99) but wore today and looked hot...
My skin looks good today.
The lip gloss color I bought.
The turkey tomato basil dish I made and ate for lunch today...God, it was tasty.
The fact we're booked for New York and now we just need to decide do we want to share a bathroom or have our own...hmmm...
*told you bitter blogging would be back...
"Well maybe I'll start dating again in September, that way my 2 Vegas vacations will be out the way * I know rough life and my New York trip will be done. But on the other hand, while I'm in Vegas in May, I might meet someone who lives there or some shit then I can act like I'm gonna date them* cuz according the experts the only way to get over someone is using someone else...and you know I'll be back in Vegas about 2 weeks after that. So I can schedule a date with them. I mean, I know won't give it up cuz unless I talk to them over 1300 minutes and have an $400 phone bill to prove it, the panties aren't coming off. There's just no possible way to talk 1300 minutes in 2 weeks especially if they aren't Verizon and they will lose points for that. But say I do go on the date, I can then end it with "Hey, it's not gonna work out....I just know it.....But if you wanna come back to room you can because I have my room that my friend originally booked for me cuz he thought "my friend from Cali" would be joining. I would hate to have it go to waste.."..In July I can go back to working because that's all my fucking ass does now.Then in August, I will be swept away by someone in New York or Staten Island or Brooklyn for all I know but Hey- I'm only in town for 4 days....Gotta end it,....I know you liked the way I took down that Falafel in Times Square and you think we were connected...but Hey, I just don't think it's gonna work out. You say tomato, I say tomahto.....I know I shared with you how I love Sponge Bob while drunk and cooking and I know you wanted to try my Krabby Patty.....but hey accept it......
Ooh and upon returning to Seattle,I will try and date a local because again according to the experts, relationships only work out if you're the same city. Because O.M.G,.....O.M.G you know other shit doesn't matter but that zip code seems to matter.That zip code will determine my happiness. Oh I don't think it's gonna work because I live in the 98087 and you live in the 98136 and I'll have to sit in fucking traffic every time I wanna kiss you or bring you Spam with eggs. And you might meet someone in the 98108 and in the long run...my kiss and my Spam won't matter..... so let's end it here...But I won't feel bad when I leave The Vegas, The New Yorker and The Local behind. Because I'm in love with this guy in the 91330 who wants nothing to do with me......
God, I'm not ready to date....................."
Happy 4/20....
Ok, seriously my brother should know I'm NOT a big time weed smoker.....Even though that does sound good right now...
And furthermore, you know on regular/legal & more important holidays when you send the group text
"Merry Christmas" or " Happy Thanksgiving" , everyone in your phonebook gets it right???
I mean if the shit were personalized to me, then it would read like, "Merry Christmas....are you sitting on my lap later..."
So I have to wonder when my brother sent out the text "4/20 y'all. Lite it up, let's not babysit it!" Did Mama and Papa Reyes receive that text too...
Things that make me go hmmmm.........
if these are anything like "special brownies"......I sure could use some "perks".....
Carrie Underwood and Chace Crawford broke up via text message. What do you think: Would you ever break-up with someone by sending a text or email?
I remember sitting at my desk at work one fine afternoon a few weeks ago and reading an email to the extent of: it's over type verbage....I haven't been quite the same since.
No...no...no...no.......
Via text message? Seriously?
What are your travel plans for this spring/summer?
May: Vegas with muh East Coast buddies...
June: Vegas with muh boys...*hopefully I'm not the stripper....
August: NEW YORK CITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm excited! The last time I was this excited was when he visited me in Seattle....and I don't think I'm stripping in NYC...hmmm....LOL...
I'm gonna eat pizza.
I'mma get a Yankees hat.
I'm gonna watch a Broadway show.
I'mma gonna get a Tshirt made with Matt Lauer's picture and it's gonna say "I'd hit this and Meredith Viera can watch"
I'm gonna sip martini's and wear something really short.
I'm gonna go commando.
I'm gonna take pictures of the trees and flowers at Central Park and post it as a screen saver.
I'm gonna take pictures of everything.
I'm gonna find Food Network.
I want to eat real DIm Sum.
I wanna eat sushi at Nobu.....
I'm gonna have coffee at Dunkin Donuts!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My co-worker and I were walking to lunch yesterday. She's talking and talking trying to cheer me up. Then she said, Girl you need to come with us to get colo...sumthin sumthin...
Huh?
I couldn't quite make out what she said. She repeated the word and all I heard was Colon what???
She said, you know when they insert this tube in your ass then they clean the inside..
LMAO.....
WHAT?
Did you just invite me to get my colon cleaned? My asshole? You want me to join you in ass cleaning? What happened pedicures and massages and shit like that, you know normal activities....
Why would I want someone putting a tube in my ass?
I don't have problems shitting.
An apple a day helps keeps the colon-spa-day away....
I just think there's other things I could do to clean myself out without stickin it in muh ass.......
I know that many of you who know me know that I HATE text messaging. Even though I hate text messages sooooo much, I seem to still go over my 500 a month, so that wouldn't include my Verizon friends because it's free, I believe to tell me in 160 characters or less about your day or your diarrhea or the strippers you saw or you would like to see......
It's a fact that when I don't have an established friendship with someone and they ask me out via text, I say no. Because for one, I don't care what year it is, some things never change. That would be the phone and learning how to use it properly.
So yesterday, I'm fucking around with my co-workers Blackberry trying to figure out how to use it and send texts with the shit. It was fustrating. Pushing the Cap button...where's this other button at....Damn 5 minutes of my life gone. In Kristina world, I can do a lot in five minutes. I can also say a lot in 5 minutes as well. I was so fustrated with the damn phone, I wanted to throw the shit out the window. My other co-worker asks whats wrong and I'm like" I hate fucking texts"..
1. The shit is misinterpreted. * when he wrote "yes" Did he mean Yes! or yesss...*sigh or yes. or YES...or...See 15 minutes of your life gone again trying to figure out the mood of the "yes"
So last night I send him a picture text of the snow in Seattle. The response is "damn, I would actually love that right now" Let's misinterpret this one and rub my ego for once and I'm gonna think he was talking about me and not the snow.....*daydreaming......ah.....*getting wet, from the snow of course.....
ANYWAYS...so I was told about Ill-literacy. And here we go...check it out......
Show us a spice in your kitchen.
Submitted by homebody.
