Posts (page 2)
1. I've come to realize that my boobs...aren't quite as big as they used to be but are still a handful.
2. I've come to realize that when I talk...I usually have to repeat myself like 5 fucking times.
3. I've come to realize that when I love someone... I put myself last.
4. I've come to realize that I need...time to heal.
5. I've come to realize that I have lost..not only a lover but a good friend.
6. I've come to realize that I hate it when... people chew really loud and smack their lips.
7. I've come to realize that if I'm drunk...I'll piss just about anywhere including men's bathrooms.
8. I've come to realize that money..is one of the factors that destroyed my marriage.
9. I've come to realize that people...in Alaska enjoy fish in their ice cream.
10. I've come to realize that I'll always be...that girl who wishes upon a star.
11. I've come to realize that I have a crush on...Don, until he didn't hold the door for me and he saw me coming and it slammed in my face. Fuckin asshole, it's make believe over....
13. I've come to realize that my cell phone is...wonderful and now if only it rang......
14. I've come to realize that when I woke up this morning...I am ready to hit da mitts....
15. I've come to realize that before I go to sleep at night...I should really wash my face and say a little prayer.
16. I've come to realize that right now I am thinking about...what someone said to me last night.
18. I've come to realize that when I get on Vox...I'm like an open book.
19. I've come to realize that today I will..go to my boxing session then hit the buffet with my family and fucking grub!!!!!!!!!!
20. I've come to realize that tonight I will...spend time with my daughter.
21. I've come to realize that tomorrow I will...celebrate Mothers Day.
22. I've come to realize that I really want...a place to call home.
23. I've come to realize that my parents...make me smile even though they know how to really light a fire under me.
24. I've come to realize that love...is bullshit.
25. I've come to realize that crying...has made the bags under my eyes worse and the fuckin concealer I bought isn't quite helping.
26. I've come to realize short people... look really short to me cuz Im 5"7.
27. I've come to realize that food...can still taste wonderful and be healthy for you too.
28. I've come to realize that my roommate...acts like a 3 year old and calls me "Mama".
29. I've come to realize that working....hard enables me to play hard.
30. I've come to realize that my life...could be A LOT worse.
I kill me sometimes...
The other day I came into work looking kinda proper. Well, I curled my hair, that was about it. Sorry, no pictures of it. ANYWAYS..I met my best friend for lunch that day. I took her to this little cafe where they have these bomb ass panini's.So we enjoyed our little plates of food for big prices.
Then I made a special purchase.
I go back to work and I am just fucking glowing happy. I run and tell my boss and coworker that " I got something." They heard: "I got some" They're like, who, what, where, nooner..they're basically jumping for fucking joy..Then I said, "NO...I got SOME-THING.." They're like oh...ah..what'd you get...did your homegirl take you down the adult store..did you get a dildo? "
I gave them the bag to open.
"Kristina- "
Yes.
"this is a cookie."
Yes, chocolate chip.
"You didn't go to the toy store?"
No.
"You didn't curl your hair cuz you had a date & your homegirl wasn't a coverup?"
No.
"Kristina, we haven't seen you smile like this in awhile..you're smiling like over a damn cookie...Kristina, you need to get laid"
Well, it's a REALLY good cookie....
"You should be gettin excited over some sex, not cookies..."
Oh....
They say chocolate is like good sex right???
Ok, maybe not. I guess I would have rather have had a nooner than the cookie but hey. Hmmm...you know it's funny.Earlier that morning they told me you'll never get a better workout than from when you have sex. I said, " Damn, I guess I'mma gain weight soon then.." See, now if I continue with that attitude and eat some fucking cookies for pleasure..yikes.
I don't think I need a good fuck, I think I just need some excitement in my life. OK, maybe I do need to stop self baking my cookies.
I'm one of those people where I find hidden meanings in my dreams.Some of them are very obvious but lately I just don't understand. Every night I have been dreaming about him. Nothing sexual, just regular dreams. Like we're hanging out somewhere or some shit. It's been almost a solid 2 months since I've spoken to him which this is why I don't understand the dreams.
I can't possibly see what would be the meaning.
I wish we were hanging out? He still has an influence on certain decisions I make in life?
Well, time for my negative affirmations:
I can dream all I want, reality is he's not a part of my life. And since he didn't feel the same, he's not thinking about me.:( Negative affirmations...only in Kristina's world.....
This was an email sent to me this morning.
From: Kim
Sent: Thursday, May 08, 2008 7:32
AM
To: Kristina
Subject: Yesterdays challenge. ...
I really enjoy myself yesterday and today I’m feeling better about myself. I went home and relaxed and kicked back. That was the first time I did relax since we moved into the Condo. Exercising, released some of my stress. My husband is happy for me.J
I want to tell you, thank you.
Kim
I'm not trying to be a mean mom.
But this is what happened. And in my defense, all I have is me. I don't have the other parent or male figure around for guidance or to second guess my parenting decisions.
Gabby loves her snack when I pick her up from daycare. Usually I give her a banana or crackers...you know something to carry her over while I'm at the gym. The bananas I've been buying have been pretty huge lately. So I cut part of it and give her the bigger portion.
She really wanted her banana, so I gave her the half that was hers. She's SO upset that the banana is open and that she wasn't able to open it herself. Right now she's in that stage where " I wanna do it myself Mama.." is all I hear.
Well, before I even leave the parking lot, she throws it in an angry fit.
I turn around and I said:
"Gabby, why did you throw it? You wanted a banana, I gave you a banana..just because it was open doesn't mean you can't eat it"
She's pouting...not answering..
"You know, no cartoons tonight. We will go home, eat dinner and not mac and cheese, take a bath and we're going to sleep........"
Silence the whole car ride.
When we arrive at home, she says she wants the banana. I asked if she can say sorry about throwing it and she says NO. Ok, "Well, let's eat dinner and don't even think about the TV"
"Mama, cartoons.........."
"NO"
"mac and cheese....cartoons..."
"NO, your dinner is chicken, with noodles and peas...that is cheese, it's just white, eat it now."
It was really cream of mushroom sauce.
"Mama, I threw the banana at you in the car now I'm in trouble"
"Yes."
"If you finish your dinner, you can watch TV for 30 minutes then it's bath time"
She finished her dinner, we played "goin to get a happy meal" and "shake yo booty"...Then we took a bath. She's getting her 30 minutes of TV right now as I type this.
The reason why I thought I was being harsh on a 3 year old was because I told her no cartoons and especially no mac and cheese. Fuck, everyday..mac and cheese, mac and cheese. She likes other foods but dammit mac and cheese can't be dinner every week night when I have her.
Well, on a positive note, she did apologize and bat those beautiful eyes of hers. And I didn't lose my temper with her, which is something I found doing last month when my stress was at it's highest point.
Has anyone ever done something so horrible to you that "I'm sorry" couldn't fix it?
OOH...does spending the last year and a half of your life falling in love with someone, talking to them everyday/night-thinking you have some kind of special friendship, flying to California and flying them up here, then canceling all your plans on the spur of the moment for the weekend and flying down there again to see them so you can enjoy their presence in the month of March and then you return and they are no longer a part of your life. ........Does that count?
Because I feel fucking horrible, so I just need to know.
What is one thing you MUST do before you go to bed at night?
I try and figure out what I'm going to wear the next day or else it'll be like this morning....I'll be running around here shortly with no idea!
Should I start with love or loathe???????
Love: on a positive note...
- The email my friend sent me trying to convince me the West Coast is doomed, the Pinoys in California are gangsta's and I may run into Sasquatch because I live Seattle..so therefore I should move to the East Coast.
- Gabby is using the potty and more importantly, telling me when she needs to go. Bye bye shitty diapers.
- Vegas is now 2 weeks away.
- I went to the gym after one week of being glued to my bed and bottles of syrupy medicines that didn't even help.
- I found the strength to make a single mom decision to throw Gabby's party anyways despite her father and I proudly said "fuck him"....
- The sandwich I scarfed down today...a panini with ham, jarlsburg cheese, garlic mustard.....*burp
- The fact his shirt still has a slight scent of him.
Loathe:
- I've been dreaming about him lately.
- I need a pedicure.
- My hips hurt from Sunday's run still.
- I need new shoes.
- I could use a new hairstyle.
Gabby is going through potty training and she tells me when she has to tear it up on the toilet. What I don't understand is how she be sitting there for 10-15 minutes on the pooper.Man, she gets that from her dad. Why can't she just be in and out like me. And she conversates with me in between droppings...and counts them in Spanish.
Cute. But when you gotta go pee yourself....
Show us something you love about Mexico.
